Task 1 General 的正式信最常見的扣分不是文法錯，是語氣滑動——formal 寫一半滑回口語。本篇把同一題投訴信寫成 Band 6 / 7 / 8 三版。
題目
You recently stayed at a hotel on holiday and you were not satisfied with the service. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter:
- give details of your stay
- explain what problems you had
- say what you would like the manager to do
Write at least 150 words.
語氣：formal（寫給不認識的經理）。
Version A — Band 6（約 160 字）
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing because I stayed at your hotel last week and I am not happy with my stay. I think you should do something about it.
I stayed at your hotel from 5th to 8th April. My room number was 312. I booked a deluxe room for my wife's birthday. It was supposed to be special for us.
But there were many problems. First, the air conditioning was broken, so the room was very hot. I called the front desk many times but no one came to fix it. Also, the breakfast was really bad. The food was cold and there was not much choice. And the staff were not friendly at all — some of them were rude to my wife.
I want you to give me my money back because the service was terrible. Please reply soon.
Yours faithfully, Chen Wei-ming
Version B — Band 7（約 175 字）
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to raise a formal complaint regarding my recent stay at the Grand Harbour Hotel, which fell significantly below the standard I had reasonably expected.
My wife and I stayed in room 312 from the 5th to the 8th of April, having booked a deluxe room some months in advance to celebrate her birthday. Unfortunately, the experience was disappointing on several counts.
Most seriously, the air conditioning in the room was completely non-functional throughout our stay. Although I reported the problem to reception on three separate occasions, no engineer was sent, and the room remained uncomfortably warm at over 28 degrees. In addition, the breakfast service consistently offered cold food and a very limited selection. I also found the attitude of several staff members to be noticeably unhelpful, which my wife found upsetting.
Given these significant shortcomings, I would appreciate a full refund of the room charges, together with a formal written apology.
I look forward to your response within fourteen days.
Yours faithfully, Chen Wei-ming
Version C — Band 8（約 185 字)
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to express considerable disappointment with my recent stay at the Grand Harbour Hotel, and to request that the matter be formally addressed.
My wife and I occupied room 312 from the 5th to the 8th of April, having reserved a deluxe suite several months in advance to mark her sixtieth birthday. What should have been a memorable occasion was, regrettably, undermined by a succession of failings that fell well short of the standard your rates imply.
Chief among these was the persistent malfunction of the air-conditioning unit, which rendered the room stiflingly warm throughout the three-night stay. Despite three separate reports to reception, no engineer was dispatched, and no alternative accommodation was offered. The breakfast service, moreover, featured consistently tepid dishes and a strikingly narrow selection, and certain staff members displayed a dismissiveness that caused my wife genuine distress.
In light of these serious lapses, I request a full refund of the room charges and a formal written apology. A response within fourteen days would be appreciated.
Yours faithfully, Chen Wei-ming
逐項對照（五個維度）
1. Task Achievement — bullet 覆蓋與細節
| Bullet | Band 6 | Band 7 | Band 8 | |--------|--------|--------|--------| | Stay details | "5th to 8th April, room 312" — 有，但短 | 加了情境 "to celebrate her birthday" | 加了期待落差 "What should have been a memorable occasion..." | | Problems | 列三個（AC、breakfast、staff）但沒分輕重 | 標出 "Most seriously" 分輕重 + 數據（28 degrees, three occasions） | "Chief among these was..." + 量化（stiflingly warm, strikingly narrow） | | Request | "I want you to give me my money back" — 直白 | "a full refund ... together with a formal written apology" | "request a full refund ... A response within fourteen days would be appreciated" — 有期限 |
2. Register — 語氣是否一致 formal（最關鍵）
| Band | Formal 破口 | 證據 | |------|-------------|------| | 6 | 多處口語化 | "I am not happy", "really bad", "not friendly at all", "Please reply soon" — 全都是口語 | | 7 | 幾乎無破口 | "noticeably unhelpful" 替代 "not friendly"；"I would appreciate" 替代 "I want" | | 8 | 完全 formal、帶 legal 質感 | "a succession of failings", "undermined", "dismissiveness that caused genuine distress" |
3. Lexical Resource
| Band | 關鍵字替換 | 證據 | |------|------------|------| | 6 | hotel was bad / food was cold / staff were rude / give me my money back | "the service was terrible" | | 7 | fell below the standard / non-functional / consistently offered / noticeably unhelpful / significant shortcomings | "fell significantly below the standard I had reasonably expected" | | 8 | succession of failings / rendered the room stiflingly warm / strikingly narrow selection / dismissiveness / serious lapses | "A response within fourteen days would be appreciated." — conditional 軟化命令 |
4. Grammatical Range
| Band | 句型 | 證據 | |------|------|------| | 6 | Simple + because / so；I 開頭重複 | "I am not happy with my stay.", "I want you to..." | | 7 | Participle phrase、passive、inversion | "having booked a deluxe room some months in advance", "Although I reported..." | | 8 | 前置分詞、倒裝、後置修飾、semicolon | "Despite three separate reports to reception, no engineer was dispatched, and no alternative accommodation was offered." |
5. 段落功能清晰度
| Band | 段落 | |------|------| | 6 | §1 目的 / §2 住宿細節 / §3 所有問題堆一段 / §4 要求 | | 7 | §1 目的 / §2 脈絡 / §3 問題（分輕重）/ §4 要求 + 期限 | | 8 | §1 目的（重、帶 considerable）/ §2 脈絡 + 情感基調 / §3 問題（Chief among these）/ §4 要求（含期限與語氣軟化）|
Takeaway — Band 6 寫作者的三個高槓桿升級
升級 1：刪掉口語招牌字
正式信禁用清單：
| 禁用 | 替換 | |------|------| | I am not happy | I am writing to express dissatisfaction | | very bad / terrible | significantly below the expected standard | | really / so / very | particularly / markedly / considerably | | Please reply soon | I look forward to your response within [time] | | I want... | I would appreciate / I would be grateful if you could... |
升級 2：把要求寫成條件式 + 時限
Band 6：I want my money back. Band 7+：I would appreciate a full refund, together with a formal written apology. I look forward to your response within fourteen days.
兩個升級：(a) would appreciate 柔化命令感；(b) within fourteen days 給時限，代表你認真處理，不是情緒宣洩。
升級 3：用 having + V-en 縮句
Band 6：I booked a deluxe room. It was for my wife's birthday. Band 7+：...having booked a deluxe room some months in advance to celebrate her birthday.
這個結構（perfect participle phrase）一出現，Grammar Range 立刻升一級。練習：把你每封信的前兩段改寫，讓至少一句以 Having... / Having been... 開頭。